What do you mean by noticing?! Do you mean to suggest that people have been engaging in foreplay and sex around me, and I've not noticed?!
[ This brings to mind when Alhaitham suggested that John pleasures himself, and then Sherlock questioned when and where he'd have the opportunity to when they lived together. Did he mistake nightmares (which Sherlock tried to soothe by playing violin) when John had actually been participating in another activity next door to him? They share a wall! They were in the same cabin on the train and ship! ]
Hell's bells... people have been having sex around me, and I have been completely unaware. I am a failure of a detective.
No, no- Well, maybe, but- I meant that you'll start to recognize the signs after the fact! Many people tend to try to hide the evidence out of embarrassment.
[He's going to have to explain all sorts of sex-related injuries to Sherlock, isn't he. It looks like Heizou won't exactly be escaping this conversation completely unphased after all.]
Admittedly it could mean you become a better detective, but if that possibility makes you uncomfortable, tell me now!
[ Oh thank God. People are not as shameless as he feared. The signs after the fact make more sense, but with how different this world is towards relationships and sex, Sherlock truly questioned how much he couldn't see. ]
Why would becoming a better detective make me uncomfortable?
[ The point.
His head.
Sorry, Heizou, certain details are going to come to light. ]
[...Hmm. Well, Heizou gave his warning. Is it his fault that Sherlock was both too innocent and too focused on other facets of this conversation to understand what he meant? Surely not!
Heizou lets out an amused sigh and shrugs.]
I guess we'll be crossing that bridge when we get there, won't we. In that case, let's start with the question that got all this started! I believe it was about how often people have sex, right?
[ Heizou is innocent of all crimes. He only wishes to help his bestie, and sometimes, his bestie needs to learn the hard way. Never mind that Sherlock never seems to learn the lesson about letting the unknown be. Also, there is alcohol, just in case. ]
... Was the number stated by Alhaitham close to an average frequency or an outlier?
[ Sherlock pauses. That interpretation hadn't entered his mind. Granted he was more concerned with if it was a lie or not, but he hadn't been aware of another possible interpretation. ]
[And here it comes. Heizou just smiles and keeps his voice very even and casual as he stirs his coffee.]
Well, is he only counting the number of... Now, what's a good word for it - Sessions, so to speak? Or is he counting how many times they've both ejaculated?
[He goes with the more scientific word for Sherlock's "benefit." He's not certain Sherlock would understand what he meant if he used a more flowery term.]
Is coming to crisis multiple times in a... session common? I thought there was a physical limitation after reaching that point.
[ He's doing math in his head. Even assuming on the low end of two times per session, then that would be twenty a week?!?! How do people get anything done?! ]
It depends on the individuals, really! Some people are utterly spent once they've orgasmed once. Others can go multiple times before they exhaust themselves, and that generally seems to be more common for women than men.
A condition in unmarried or widowed women that has a number of symptoms, among them erratic bouts of great emotion, fainting, anxiety, sleeping disorders...
[ Sherlock's words trail off as he looks at Heizou's reaction, and another dot connects. ]
... This is another misconception like self-abuse, isn't it?
[As Sherlock goes on with his description, a single eyebrow arches higher and higher. What in the world is this. Why does Sherlock's world think up such strange things about human beings.]
...Yes, Sherry. I believe it is.
[He does at least look vaguely amused at this point. Sherlock is such a brilliant man, but much of his knowledge does seem constrained by the way his world thinks.]
Your world has really left you with all sorts of funny ideas, my dear detective~
[ He's doing his best with the information he had available and paid attention to in passing for their relation to crime... To think that he once thought advanced technology and magic were what made him feel so behind and stupid compared others in this world. No, the problems are much greater.
Sherlock puts his coffee to the side only so he can put his face in his hands. ]
I am beginning to wonder if my world does anything right.
[He grins, also settling back into his chair some more.]
No, that much is abundantly clear. But when you picture yourself with Dr. Watson, what exactly do you imagine? Surely your dreams take you further than just exchanging kisses~
[Is there something mischievous in Heizou's eyes? Something that implies that maybe he knows something a little more than he's saying? Absolutely, yes.]
[ Is that a blush creeping up to the tips of Sherlock's ears? That might be a blush reaching the tips of his ears. ]
You know that John does more than kiss me in dreams, Heizou. I told you as such when I questioned my sanity and had inconveniences from those dreams.
[ He admitted that one of the reasons he couldn't do what John did with him in his dreams was because he was the "bottom." It was physically impossible. ]
[He nods with a thoughtful little hum, still watching Sherlock with that familiar analytical gaze. Searching - Waiting - for a specific reaction.]
Yes, and I didn't pry for details then, but now that we're here discussing your various curiosities, I think it'd be best to know what exactly you're trying to understand. For instance-
[And here Heizou leans back a bit, looking every bit the picture of casual innocence as his smile grows.]
-one absolutely can be fucked against a wall and not be discovered~
[ Sherlock tried to steady his nerves by taking a sip of coffee. He ends up sputtering and coughing instead, completely taken off guard. ]
Wh-what?!
[ Oh, now that blush is much more evident. Of all things, Sherlock didn't expect Heizou to say something that specific... and why did that sound so familiar? ]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2026-01-14 08:46 am (UTC)[ This brings to mind when Alhaitham suggested that John pleasures himself, and then Sherlock questioned when and where he'd have the opportunity to when they lived together. Did he mistake nightmares (which Sherlock tried to soothe by playing violin) when John had actually been participating in another activity next door to him? They share a wall! They were in the same cabin on the train and ship! ]
Hell's bells... people have been having sex around me, and I have been completely unaware. I am a failure of a detective.
no subject
Date: 2026-01-14 05:11 pm (UTC)No, no- Well, maybe, but- I meant that you'll start to recognize the signs after the fact! Many people tend to try to hide the evidence out of embarrassment.
[He's going to have to explain all sorts of sex-related injuries to Sherlock, isn't he. It looks like Heizou won't exactly be escaping this conversation completely unphased after all.]
Admittedly it could mean you become a better detective, but if that possibility makes you uncomfortable, tell me now!
no subject
Date: 2026-01-16 06:02 am (UTC)Why would becoming a better detective make me uncomfortable?
[ The point.
His head.
Sorry, Heizou, certain details are going to come to light. ]
no subject
Date: 2026-01-21 04:24 am (UTC)Heizou lets out an amused sigh and shrugs.]
I guess we'll be crossing that bridge when we get there, won't we. In that case, let's start with the question that got all this started! I believe it was about how often people have sex, right?
no subject
Date: 2026-01-25 08:47 am (UTC)... Was the number stated by Alhaitham close to an average frequency or an outlier?
[ Over ten times within a week's time?! ]
no subject
Date: 2026-01-25 04:48 pm (UTC)Ten times within a week is what he said, right? It's not impossible. Though it also depends on what exactly he's counting.
no subject
Date: 2026-01-25 05:07 pm (UTC)[ Sherlock pauses. That interpretation hadn't entered his mind. Granted he was more concerned with if it was a lie or not, but he hadn't been aware of another possible interpretation. ]
What exactly do you mean by that?
no subject
Date: 2026-01-25 05:12 pm (UTC)Well, is he only counting the number of... Now, what's a good word for it - Sessions, so to speak? Or is he counting how many times they've both ejaculated?
[He goes with the more scientific word for Sherlock's "benefit." He's not certain Sherlock would understand what he meant if he used a more flowery term.]
no subject
Date: 2026-01-25 08:58 pm (UTC)[ He doesn't even phrase it as a question at this point but takes it at face value. He clearly thought the number was the same.
(And if he thought his dreams were bad enough last February before he had all this extra... clarification, he is not prepared for this February. ]
no subject
Date: 2026-01-25 09:14 pm (UTC)There is. Quite a big one, really. And if you ask me, I'd say if they're talking about ejaculations then the number should be higher.
no subject
Date: 2026-01-26 05:50 am (UTC)Is coming to crisis multiple times in a... session common? I thought there was a physical limitation after reaching that point.
[ He's doing math in his head. Even assuming on the low end of two times per session, then that would be twenty a week?!?! How do people get anything done?! ]
no subject
Date: 2026-01-26 06:22 am (UTC)[Coffee sip! Just a tiny one! So demure!]
no subject
Date: 2026-01-26 06:40 am (UTC)Women can have orgasms?!
no subject
Date: 2026-01-26 06:17 pm (UTC)Y-Yes, Sherry! Yes, women can have orgasms!
no subject
Date: 2026-01-26 07:30 pm (UTC)Oh God. Is that what doctors do to women with hysteria?
[ His dear John is not that kind of doctor, though he doesn't doubt that he could do the job... ]
no subject
Date: 2026-01-28 02:05 am (UTC)I... What?? Why would that- What in the world do you mean by "hysteria"??
no subject
Date: 2026-01-30 10:09 am (UTC)[ Sherlock's words trail off as he looks at Heizou's reaction, and another dot connects. ]
... This is another misconception like self-abuse, isn't it?
no subject
Date: 2026-01-30 08:03 pm (UTC)...Yes, Sherry. I believe it is.
[He does at least look vaguely amused at this point. Sherlock is such a brilliant man, but much of his knowledge does seem constrained by the way his world thinks.]
Your world has really left you with all sorts of funny ideas, my dear detective~
no subject
Date: 2026-01-30 08:20 pm (UTC)Sherlock puts his coffee to the side only so he can put his face in his hands. ]
I am beginning to wonder if my world does anything right.
no subject
Date: 2026-01-31 12:03 am (UTC)I'm sure they'll come around on a lot of matters eventually. Just give your people some time~
[But back on topic--]
You're not interested in women, though. So we should get back to talking about what you are curious about.
no subject
Date: 2026-01-31 01:30 am (UTC)With a final groan at his world's... closed minded ignorance, Sherlock sinks back into his chair with his cup of coffee. ]
I have no interest in the fairer sex. I cannot for an instance ever picture myself with a woman.
[ The closest he can think of is a man in a dress. Side note: John looks funny in a dress with the mustache. Sherlock does it better. ]
no subject
Date: 2026-01-31 03:00 am (UTC)No, that much is abundantly clear. But when you picture yourself with Dr. Watson, what exactly do you imagine? Surely your dreams take you further than just exchanging kisses~
[Is there something mischievous in Heizou's eyes? Something that implies that maybe he knows something a little more than he's saying? Absolutely, yes.]
no subject
Date: 2026-01-31 05:43 am (UTC)You know that John does more than kiss me in dreams, Heizou. I told you as such when I questioned my sanity and had inconveniences from those dreams.
[ He admitted that one of the reasons he couldn't do what John did with him in his dreams was because he was the "bottom." It was physically impossible. ]
no subject
Date: 2026-01-31 06:29 am (UTC)Yes, and I didn't pry for details then, but now that we're here discussing your various curiosities, I think it'd be best to know what exactly you're trying to understand. For instance-
[And here Heizou leans back a bit, looking every bit the picture of casual innocence as his smile grows.]
-one absolutely can be fucked against a wall and not be discovered~
no subject
Date: 2026-01-31 07:03 am (UTC)Wh-what?!
[ Oh, now that blush is much more evident. Of all things, Sherlock didn't expect Heizou to say something that specific... and why did that sound so familiar? ]
(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:(no subject)
From:making that fanart "dream canon"
From: